Egg-cellent Pun Lovers Gifts

Egg ghost stories.

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"I'm more interested in hearing about the eggs you're hiding from yourself."

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

'According to his will, Tiddles left the bulk of his estate to himself. Because, he still has eight lives left.'

No Poaching! Scrambling, Frying or Boiling.

"Well, it's a simple enough work contract: as long as you produce eggs, the farmer will feed you..."

"Your four-o'clock is here."

Weather forecast

"Funny-all the king's horses don't seem to be helping at all."

Humpty the Game Warden

"Are you a blowfish, or did you just hold a sneeze?"

'Mom said I'd be a late bloomer, but this is ridiculous.'

"Ugh...I hate tailgators."

'I can't come out and play because I'm in 'Time-Out.' Although here at Grandma's it's more like 'Time-Out Lite.' '

'There's a gentleman here for a cleaning, Doctor. It's unclear whose.'

'And when they were only half the way up they were neither up nor down!'

A hen paninting her eggs with egg-shell paint

Crowing Rehearsals

"And don't get me started about being henpecked. Why do you think I crossed the road in the first place?!"

IRS, 'Sorry, but you can't count them as dependents before they hatch.'

Headless Man

"I think we need a mission statement."

"I suck!"

'Alright alright, I was joking: I won't deliver you to a couple of mongooses...'