Egg-cellent Pun Lovers Gifts

Egg ghost stories.

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

Ghost Scare-apy Sessions

"I'm more interested in hearing about the eggs you're hiding from yourself."

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

'According to his will, Tiddles left the bulk of his estate to himself. Because, he still has eight lives left.'

'So tell me, what is it about your life that isn't making sense to you.'

No Poaching! Scrambling, Frying or Boiling.

"Well, it's a simple enough work contract: as long as you produce eggs, the farmer will feed you..."

"Your four-o'clock is here."

It's not a stampede … It's a flash mob!

Weather forecast

"Funny-all the king's horses don't seem to be helping at all."

Humpty the Game Warden

"You want mechanical engineering down the hall. This is maniacal engineering."

"Are you a blowfish, or did you just hold a sneeze?"

'I can't come out and play because I'm in 'Time-Out.' Although here at Grandma's it's more like 'Time-Out Lite.' '

'Mom said I'd be a late bloomer, but this is ridiculous.'

"Ugh...I hate tailgators."

'There's a gentleman here for a cleaning, Doctor. It's unclear whose.'

'And when they were only half the way up they were neither up nor down!'

A hen paninting her eggs with egg-shell paint

Crowing Rehearsals

I was bitten by a radioactive bedbug – My superpower is getting a solid eight hours of sleep every night. Wow. So lucky.

"And don't get me started about being henpecked. Why do you think I crossed the road in the first place?!"

I only lay egg whites.

"And this is Paul - he's in charge of our TikToks..."

IRS, 'Sorry, but you can't count them as dependents before they hatch.'

'John and Yolko.'

Headless Man

Jesus 'raising' chickens as a kid

"I suck!"