Educational Irony Explorer Pillows

"My office door is always open; however, I'm rarely there."

'By the second week of instruction all first-graders should be able to count to one.'

"Shows you how much I know."

The Enemies Within? They're the Boys in Blue

Whoever said "Brevity is the soul of wit" must have not read many tweets!

"We're not admitting any wrong doing, but we've agreed to pay a ten Zillion dollar fine.''

"Hi! It's me...I've gone off the rails"

'Try rebooting.'

Spam on the Menu at Internet Cafe.

"Listen Smith, I don't care if the older boys are picking on you or not, you have to come into school - you're the deputy head for goodness sake!"

Scandal about listening on Facebook

A socially distanced queue

Manual automation in the office.

'Good news! Some guy stole my identity online. Now he's saddled with my bad credit rating.'

"But, dad, this will make sure I don't get saddled with college student debt."

"We realize you do better on your I.Q. tests than you do on anything else, but you just cannot major in I.Q."

'When the computer senses that you are in a hurry, it automatically slows down.'

"Don't tell Noah about the vasectomy."

The nice thing about soccer is that there are no commercials.

The word going around is that the business administration graduates are hiring the engineering graduates.

'Thanks for suggesting that Web-based bank. Now instead of waiting on line, I get to wait online.'

'Is plastic okay? -- Even though it comes from oil?'

"A life sentence isn't so bad. With good behavior, a poor diet, smoking and lack of exercise, you'll be out in no time."

'My Twitter followers didn't follow me into hell.'

Noah's Ark Security.

"Just teachers' lounge will suffice, Al."

Walter Farkas. October 2018. #DeadToo

"So get out there, and join the ranks of the unemployed!"

'They say he's the very last person on Facebook...'

"Our burglary is being featured on the crime show tonight, what a pity they took the television."

"It's an entire Web site of things you can buy to consume less."