Educational Comedy Aficionado Gifts

'...And that should cover all my rules for the class.'

A Puppet Named Juan

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

"Here's to non-electric sharpeners."

'It's basically a good master's thesis, but the word you want is 'serfs,' not 'smurfs.''

Math Teacher

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

Master's Degrees of the Universe

Dept. of Engineering. It's a well-written paper, but a "gyroscope" is not a device for looking at tiny Greek sandwiches.

"Class, this is David. He's our new financial exchange student."

"There are no dumb questions, Billy, but there are plenty of dumb answers!"

'Did you know there's a river in Brazil named after Amazon?'

'Ms. Shelby, I think you're spinning out of control.'

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

'People, get a half-life!'

"I'm sorry, but your child just isn't very sharp. But don't worry. It's perfectly natural."

'How do you like that? We just get through the alphabet and she starts hauling in the heavy artillery!'

University. I never really understood geometry until the instructor brought up pizzas.

String Theory for Beginners.

"The battle of Gettysburg? Uh. . . let me check my civil war app."

It makes no sense. The number of books that can be stored on a small device is constantly increasing, yet school kids seem to be lugging around bigger backpacks every year!

"Don't forget the nucleus has mass."

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

'I think I have aixelsyd.'

'We don't know what this is called'

'I'm taking the 'learn from my mistakes' approach to education.'

"I've got the ninth grade chemistry class this term."

"If it really is a smartphone, why are my grades still lousy?"

Party Schools...

'Virgil is on the gymnastics team.'

'The principal is keeping my teacher after school. She kicked the computer.'