Education Revolutionary Gifts

Sweet Girl Graduates

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

"It says 'break glass' but it doesn't say what glass!'

'What's play?'

Coronavirus Impact on Children

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

"Coronavirus, masks requirements, falling test scores, student violence - we need to be able to pray in school!"

Budget

"We've created a safe, nonjudgmental environment that will leave you child ill-prepared for real life."

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

'Lessons have been learned.'

"In this one, references to everything have been deleted."

'I wasn't playing hooky -- I was fleeing the deteriorating public school system.'

6th Grade Do-You-Own Research Fair

"Congratulations! It's a pass."

'Exams were harder before the Renaissance.'

"Hold it right there! Our legislature is currently considering new measures to protect children from the insidious ravages of cell phones in schools!"

New dunce caps

'In the future, everyone will have fifteen minutes of tenure.'

'The trouble with education is everyone knows how to teach, but nobody knows how to learn.'

New Curriculum Timetable - All in Cantonese.

I channeled John Dewey. He says if you want to be a good teacher, don't teach reading and writing. Teach students.

"So basically you're telling us that you make the youngest of your species sit in a room for twelves years and that is an education. . . you're kidding, right?"

The Church of DanaeDanaeism: 'Intellectual bigotry...Go ahead, blaspheme my holy scriptures, the media loves it...'

'Today in school we learned how to blame everything on the United States!'

"I'm holding George back this year because he's failed to forge a personal style."

'He has a learning disability all right - television!'

"No textbooks. I'm strictly Web-fed."

"Buy stock in a college?...I don't think you can...but why would we?"

Elections in German - If 'The Greens' come to power. . .

NO CRT

"What's the point of school? We can just look all this stuff up on wikipedia."

Truth In Education

'She's the only girl in her home economics class.'