Education Funster Pillows

"I didn't bring an apple, so how about a fruit roll up?"

"I didn't say my dog ate my homework. I said Russian bots ate my homework."

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

British savings accounts

'You're close, Spencer, but usually a business plan is a little more involved!'

'Recent studies in primate colonies suggest that organizational performance can be improved by replacing complicated financial incentives with bananas.'

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

What happens when the bears are running the market.

'In order to fund your deferred compensation, we won't be paying you any salary.'

'Don't worry about a few pounds up or down. Our main concern is always your bottom line.'

In-House Entertainment Consists Of Man Riding Pizza Cutter Cutting Giant Pizza While Making a Pizza

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

'I love it when you say - 'I'm going to print money'.'

'Oh, wait. There's a note. It says; Fill her up with euros.'

'It takes great courage of conviction to know you're wrong, yet still proceed forward.'

'Well, Eddy may look a bit rough, but he's good at heart - last week, he bought stocks from a company which produces cuddly puppy toys in pink ballet dresses!'

"I was all set to go to the gym, but you'd be amazed how much, yoga class and pour-a-glass, sound alike."

Pirates

"Dad, the dean has gone over your financial statement, and he doesn't think you're working up to your full potential."

'Looks like your recovery has been slowed by a diet rich in Greece, followed by a bout of gas problems. Continue to take your QE and call me next quarter.'

10 Days Without an Interest Rate Change

'Stocks fell on the news that whatever can go wrong, usually does go wrong.'

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

"I didn't say I started jogging, I said blogging."

"This place has a water view if you're looking at the mortgage."

'Don't panic, folks! It's red ink, not blood!

Guess your net worth, only 25 cents.

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

"Oh I don't mind the jogging, but I think you tricked me. When you asked if I wanted to exercise, I thought you said, extra fries!"

"I don't like to complain, but this cud is a bit overchewed."

The TROU of the Baroque

"Goodbye cruel world."

Ten business commandments, city trading floor

"The water for your fishbowl was approved, but it looks like for now you're not getting the fish."