Education Escapologist Gifts

Danny always had trouble with math. (written on board: Ohio is the capital of Wisconsin.'

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

"This was a wicked-hard test. I'm pretty sure everybody got a bad grade."

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

Something tells me it's not going to be a good school report!

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

"I've just about had it with these corporate retreats!"

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

'Now then, Simpkins. What makes you think you could become a circus clown?'

"All right, what's it going to take to make this homework go away?"

'I'm not very good at mingling.'

'Can I go home now, before I get overeducated?'

Man at Fire Escape sees door with 'Hot Button Issues Escape',

Guru levitates while wife vacuums.

'Your mother and I want you to know that you wouldn't be hurting our feelings if you decided not to go to University.'

"Don't be afraid – it's just your office,"

worker sign: weeks to retirement changable 2078,

"I told you they had a tough interview process here."

'Good, I was hoping to catch you before you left.'

'Out of office - Please leave your emails in the inbox next door.'

'I pretended to be religious to get a place at this convent.'

"I am afraid Mr. Jones is in his career coaching session. Can I get him to call you back?"

How will this impact me?

As I understand it, if the ancient Greeks had had television to watch and video games to play, we wouldn't be stuck with all this stupid geometry.

"If my husband finds out about us. . .listen, we must cover our tracks so well that no one believes that dinosaurs and humans existed at the same time!"

"IF you wanted to leave, why didn't you just say so?"

Houdini 2019

"Hi! I am on the rails!"

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

Teacher's Lounge

"I'm un-retiring today. Spending time with my family with hell."

'Wait for me!'

'Occasionally, one will escape its cubicle, which is why I have all my employees get an identification tattoo on the inside of their ears.'