Edgy Comedian Pillows

"You're neck's on my list. . !"

'I met my wife in unfortunate circumstances. I was single.'

Optimist

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

"It's no good, Bertie—we must either find some other place to meet or break off the affair altogether."

'He's normally not affectionate, but he's really taken a liking to you!'

"Dad, my web toon characters can't be normal! They have to be stereotyped crazies who are totally abnormal!"

'For Sale by Neighbor'

"I'm putting you on country music."

"One group gets tiny copies of the 'Times,' the other gets tiny copies of the 'Post.'"

"Yeah, uh, maybe you're not cut out to be the 'sparkly' kind of vampire."

Where's my global warming?

Devil tattoo.

"Aha! - Proof that this is definitely an iron-age site..."

'If they don't laugh, we'll say it's art.'

Monet At Open Mic Night

"I would have thought you'd be pleased."

"Hold on, one more thing to go."

The Last of the Passenger Pigeons

Funeral for a Cartoonist

"Two minutes out of the water and he's already evolvier-than-thou."

'I'll pay double for half as much.'

Ye Olde FIgure-Drawing Classe

Uri Geller's cutlery drawer. All of the spoons in the drawer a bent.

'Underground cartoonist'

Pick your own fruit - Pick your own nose

Manhole Warning

Make Your Own

'Have you heard about the origami shop?'

Clown Cowboy:'DRAW!'

"OK so - this might sound kinda crazy - but what do you think of me peeing on you?"