Economic Analyst Humor Gifts

Scandalous!

Avocado Prices

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

Trickledown economics

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

'We buy and sell them.'

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'

'He's known for his pessimistic prognostications on the stock market.'

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

Inflating assets to get a loan. Too poor to pay taxes

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

Government Handouts.

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

"These days, many people can only afford to drink from home."

"Since it cost as much as our house, can we take out a mortgage instead of a loan?"

Bad case of credit crunch, I'm afraid, so we'll have to slowly introduce you to a diet of cash.

Office of Management & Budget. Now hiring: crowdfunding expert to reduce the U.S. budget deficit.

Leprechaun finds EU bail out at the end of a rainbow.