Humorous Economist Gifts

'Thank you for participating in the 'Redistribution of Wealth' movement.'

'I can't make ends meet, let alone justify the means.'

More toxic assets.

"This way we save a fortune on the licence fee."

"...Or we could give to the rich, and it would just trickle down to the poor."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

'This financial report is frightening. Who wrote it, Stephen King?"

"While we're on the subject of earnings, does anyone have a clever metaphor using the word, 'toilet'?"

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'

Trickledown economics

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

"Good to see they're trying to keep the high street vibe."

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'I feel I owe a lot to my country.' - 'So, you haven't paid your income tax again.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

'We buy and sell them.'

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'What can we do to reduce our spending?'

A Double-Dip Recession with Sprinkles

'He's known for his pessimistic prognostications on the stock market.'

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

Investments: Still Open to New Investors - 'A fool & his money fund.'

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

Inflating assets to get a loan. Too poor to pay taxes

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'