Humorous Economist Gifts

'Thank you for participating in the 'Redistribution of Wealth' movement.'

'I can't make ends meet, let alone justify the means.'

More toxic assets.

"This way we save a fortune on the licence fee."

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'

Trickledown economics

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'We buy and sell them.'

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

'I feel I owe a lot to my country.' - 'So, you haven't paid your income tax again.'

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

'What can we do to reduce our spending?'

A Double-Dip Recession with Sprinkles

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

Investments: Still Open to New Investors - 'A fool & his money fund.'

Government Handouts.

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

'He's known for his pessimistic prognostications on the stock market.'

Inflating assets to get a loan. Too poor to pay taxes

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

Bad case of credit crunch, I'm afraid, so we'll have to slowly introduce you to a diet of cash.