Eco Stylist Gifts

"Just a little off the top and shape the back."

'I want to immortalise the area in a painting before it is changes for ever.' (Artist is scooped up by a digger.)

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

'The Prom Dress: One Week Later'

I want a car that says 'I've arrived' but didn't use too much gas getting there.

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

Recycling - Perfectly good bits you can't recycle or give away...

"I hear that bamboo is all the rage this year."

I talked my new client into an eco-landscape. Well done. Walls using local stone. Native trees and plants. Plus

'Muriel makes all her own clothes out of junk mail.'

'... so I decided to make us all fabulous new outfits from the Guardian environment supplement!'

Here's eco club's green-prom tip sheet. Let's see. Wear vintage clothing. Buy locally grown corsage flowers. Use biodegradable cups and plates. Eco club. This is so obvious. How about the tough stuff? Ok. Who knows where to recycle gel pads from push-up bras? The place that takes the fake hair extensions?

Ikea for Hippies

Where Pleather Comes From

Eden. There's great leaves to wear growing on this vine. Ah, it's the new summer clothing line!

"This weather changes in a heart-beat! I moved here last year and am never sure how to dress!"

"We're thinking of having your nose pierced."

"Let's save this gift wrap. I'm sure we can use it again. Remind me not forget about using this next year."

Lily Costume

Ikea for hippies

Our dance has to be sustainable. I'll send electronic invites. Eco Club. We can hang white LED Christmas lights. The food will be seasonal! Ice cream? W. Fester School.

Bird box with amenities (plumbing, electricity).

'We're carbon off-setting.'

"Did you throw away this tabletop?"

Relax, it's fake fur.

'It's nice when people give Christmas presents that you appreciate.'

Botox pump outside a cosmetology clinic.

"It's made of all-natural materials, but needs a little wedding on occasion!"

"Well...there goes our hempline!"

"I want something sassy but easy to take care of if the ice caps melt."

What should I wear to the eco club dance? Something recycled. Yeah, but it has to be hot. W. Fester Thrift Shop. Who're you trying to catch? Sigh! Ryan Beardsley. Dressing reports. You can definitely catch a cold.

"They're all in fashion this time of year - just pick one!"

'We've reduced the carbon footprint of this model to a size 5 with stiletto heels.'

Hugo Boss is Planning a Vegan Suit!

'Muriel makes all her own clothes out of junk mail.'