Eco-friendly Nibblers Gifts

"Is the MSG local?"

The Classy Dog: 'Dine & dance hotdogs: '50 cents a dance'.

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

"All our donuts are hand fried in what will eventually become biofuel."

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

"You had me at alternative milk."

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

"Welcome to the Short Staffed Cafe serving food like your grandma cooked. Is your grandma busy? We really need a cook."

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

"Since he retired, he hasn't quite figured out what to do with himself!"

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

My boat

The youth shows responsibility!

'All our food is locally sourced.'

Walking here to the tavern allows me to decrease my carbon footprint and increase my bourbon footprint.

A vampire lays in his coffin and he has put his vampire dentures in a glass beside the coffin.

'It's a shame that valuable water gets wasted to wash cars or to take showers. It should be used responsible and for useful purposes only - for example to make whiskey.'

"I envy you. I'd love to have a house with a fireplace."

Fish and Chips - "Could you please blow into this bag for me, Sir?"

"When I was a child I spoke as a child... but when I became a man I put away childish things... except for my Cocoa Puffs... I still love Cocoa Puffs."

'I just love eating organic food.'

'I don't care if it has lettuce, tomato, special sauce on a sesame bun...it's still liver!'

"To bat that stupid rolled-up sock around all morning or not to bat the stupid sock around, that is the question."

Foodie Bank

"My New Year's resolution last year was to recycle more, and since it was so successful, I'll recycle it for this year!"

Man eating 'after work mints'

Ditching Masks as Lockdown Eases

Whiskey, gin...doesn't matter. I'm into flex fuels.

"He says he's three months late because of Readers' Block!"

'Second childhood menu, please!'

'Jenkins, you could be a great salesman if only you'd stop barking at customers and nibbling the furniture.'

'Well, it might be hard to believe now, but in my youth, I was the fastest animal on land...'

'She went down 80 years ago, and there's still a line to get to the wine bar.'