Eco-conscious Caffeine Lover Gifts

'I like my extra bold Rain Forest-friendly dark roast with a can of industrial strength chemical energy drink.'

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

Eternal Student.

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

"I'll wait a moment for everyone's energy drink to kick in."

"Give me all the caffeine you have."

"You're a strong, virile stallion of a man, Randy. Has anyone ever told you that?"

Politically Correct Snowperson

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

Office Supplies/Coffee Supplies.

Sale! Weed Whackers

You've Had Enough!

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"Motivational seminars are too expensive. Just buy stronger coffee."

'Would you all please congatulate...'

Countervailing Clichés.

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

Non-Power Breakfast

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

Writers without borders.

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

"Hey, that's disgusting! You can't leave that on the footpath: Make sure your master comes and picks it up!"

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

"In accordance with our new 'sharing of responsibilities initiative,' you'll all be responsible for getting my coffee." i

EU and India partnership.

"Right now it's between you and two hundred and fifty other people who came to Seattle, moved in with five roommates, joined a band, took a job in a coffee bar, got fed up, had a meeting with themselves, and decided it was time to go out and find a real job."

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

"I've decided to make myself another cup of coffee!"

'What's holding him up?'