Early Riser Ponderer Pillows

Hour of rising vs worm acquisition.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

"I know we got early to catch him...but he looks so cute I just can't eat him!"

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

Have you got your make up on yet?

Totalitarian Humour

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

French Early Bird

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

'It's only 6 AM, but I want to send the kids to Wally's house before his mother sends him over here.'

Evolution of a coffee drinker.

Early Bird Gets the Worm/Night Owl Does the Worm

"Hold on... did you mean to hit Snooze or Jazz?"

1,572 Performances.

'Now that we've moved to Hawaii, I can start trading at 3:30 a.m.--Isn't that great?'

'Honey, the neighbors have persuaded me to stop coming out into the hallway every morning to play 'reveille'!'

Waking Up With Rooster.

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

"It's time to wake up!"

'You see, you don't really need a cigarette to wake up in the morning.'

'When 900 years you reach, retire, you will not.'

'You know what they say Mum: The early bird catches the worm! So I'm sleeping in...'

Sleepwalking to work.

Young girl asks young boy what time he wakes in the morning

'The farmer's kids asked me to wake them early tomorrow: It's Christmas day!'

Judges alarm clock: 'beep beep, all rise!'

Early Night Club

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

"Coffee?! After 20 minutes of waiting, I'm FULLY awake without one."

"The fact that you're here means you will continue to make poor life decisions."

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."