Early Riser Ponderer Pillows

Hour of rising vs worm acquisition.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

"I know we got early to catch him...but he looks so cute I just can't eat him!"

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

French Early Bird

'It's only 6 AM, but I want to send the kids to Wally's house before his mother sends him over here.'

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

And if he wants to keep his job, the early bird better get me a coffee, too.

Evolution of a coffee drinker.

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

Totalitarian Humour

Have you got your make up on yet?

'Now that we've moved to Hawaii, I can start trading at 3:30 a.m.--Isn't that great?'

1,572 Performances.

Early Bird Gets the Worm/Night Owl Does the Worm

"Hold on... did you mean to hit Snooze or Jazz?"

'Honey, the neighbors have persuaded me to stop coming out into the hallway every morning to play 'reveille'!'

Waking Up With Rooster.

'You see, you don't really need a cigarette to wake up in the morning.'

"It's time to wake up!"

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

'When 900 years you reach, retire, you will not.'

Sleepwalking to work.

'You know what they say Mum: The early bird catches the worm! So I'm sleeping in...'

Judges alarm clock: 'beep beep, all rise!'

"The fact that you're here means you will continue to make poor life decisions."

Young girl asks young boy what time he wakes in the morning

Early Night Club

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

'The farmer's kids asked me to wake them early tomorrow: It's Christmas day!'

"Hurry, I've been waiting for you."