Early Bird Holiday Preparer Gifts

'Finally it's October!...The smell of autumn in the air...setting up the displays to sell decorations for the Christmas retail season...!'

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Airlines

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

Mr. Punch in Venice

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

Italia tours

Heading off with a packed bag

Camping-Pong

'See you in two weeks!'

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

Wizard of Oz - repeat fees

The Problem with On-the-fly Christmas Caroling

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"

"I'll be there in three 'All Too Well's."

Twas the week before Christmas and all thru the house

"I know it’s a challenge, but it needs your input!" "...Your breadth of knowledge of different interest groups, religions...cultures!" "Right, so the staff Christmas meal will be a traditional lacto-vegan one at a Thai restaurant sometime in March?" "Do you think the Pagans will be OK with that?"

Santa's wash day.

'No, no, no. You guys are way off! This isn't even the cat. You guys are on the dog.'

'We must have everything... this is all that's left!'

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

A tourist struggling with loads of luggage

"We can't go. We don't have enough carbon offset credits to get to the Grand Canyon."

'Let it go, Amy.'

"Well, all I know is he left on vacation to unwind... and he never wound-up again!"

'If that's my wife, pencil her in for Boxing Day.'

"What happened to the good old Jewish holidays when all we used to do was eat?"

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'