Dynamic Duo Lover Gifts

"It's a new signal to specify that we don't need Robin."

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"Truth is relative at these reunions. It depends on which relative you talk to."

No caption (A crash test dummy in the shape of a bird flies toward a window. Other birds dressed as scientists study the experiment from the ground).

Man says: 'Great pizza, but the mozzarella was a bit stringy.'

"He may be neutered and declawed, but he's still dangerous."

"The blow drier is broken."

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

"I think the banana looks like a mustache, or a weird smile or something. How about an apple? ... Just a suggestion."

CFL bulb and ice cream cone fall in love

Home Business - Printer Ink.

Old and young

It's not always a good idea for two contrarians like you to be together. Amanda Kern. Comics Counseling. You hear that, you old battle-axe? Yeah, I hear that, you old coot. That'll be $150.

How about swapping wives for the day?

"I'm Roberto, and I'll be your waiter this evening. This is Carl. He's in charge of portion control."

'Are you still mad at me for calling you a creep in my letter to 'Dear Abby'?'

'I'm a mover and my wife is a shaker -- it works out.'

'We're a team - he walks the walk, and I talk the talk!'

His worst nightmares had come true.

'I've always thought they were up to something whenever we're gone'

Herbert can't read, Janice can't jump, but together they can rule the world!

"You've had to be kind to survive, and I've had to be nasty."

Dog: "Have you noticed? He looks more like me all the time."

Sadojazzachists

Dance Partners

Batmansplaining.

Artist studies trampolinist.

Wife Knitting Using Wool from Husband's Sweater.

Fisherman telling wife and then cat how big the fish was

"We can try and MEND a damaged heart, but not a BROKEN one."

'Hi honey I'm Home.'

Man answers phone in middle of the night annoying his wife.

"Thanks and here's some gas money."