Dust Detective Pillows

'Non-alcoholic wines? Aisle 7, on the left - just keep shoveling dust 'til you hit them.'

"Darling - these shelves could do with a dust..."

"My new glasses can see every speck of dust. That's why I don't wear them."

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

The interested bystanders.

Evolution.

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

We have a problem with your research. We're Encyclopedia Britannica and you're Wikipedia.

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

'Its that final touch that makes it seem just like a natural pond.'

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'Nothing this week †between your pay and your deductions, you broke even.'

"I have my green thumb, thanks to my black 'n' blue knees!"

"Bad debts, yes, but you can't deduct bad trips."

"So in other words, we're hoping to discover what makes the nitty, gritty."

'...and then you smile and say...all together now...'that's not deductible.'.'

"I don't use straws anymore. Straws are bad for the environment."

'Take a look at this everyone - it just could be the signature we've been looking for.'

"When the IRS sees your deductions they'll get a good laugh!"

After income tax, pension and national insurance I end up owing £450.

"I keep hearing this annoying buzzing noise!"

'No, it's not the Rapture - The kids next door got a trampoline.'

'Yes Sarge - looks like another carbon footprint'

I can carry all the plastic bags I need!

Man sells IRS insurance outside IRS building.

Think Zero Defects

'Tch! Look at the dust in here.'

'It's a simple change. Instead of software, you should be writing off your employees as hardware.'

'I don't know, Al... A dumpster in the middle of the woods! Seems kind of fishy to me.'

Fire at the Bisto Factory

"I drive to work every day. Those are business trips, aren't they?"

"Have I met my deductible yet?"

'I'm from China!'

'Do you have anything that will help me do my taxes?' 'Yes, but we're not allowed to sell it on Sundays.'

"How's this? 'Employee grants to Company, throughout the universe, the omniverse, including all fictional universes of parallel universes yet to be discovered...'"