Druid Admirer Pillows

You got it wrong again. It's spring ahead, fall back.

"Tomorrow will be mainly sunny, but with some scattered showers..."

"Has anyone got the faintest idea what we started to build?"

'Do you really expect me to believe that this is what you've been doing for 30 years?'

"This place has the best happy hour."

"Just let her believe in fairies a little while longer."

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

You're dead to me, Marsha. And that's just the way I like it."

'OK, so I fumbled. Now can you cure it or not?'

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"I said slime."

"Whosoever slays this dragon may marry the princess."

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

"800 years old?!! - Gosh... you must be feeling very 'long-in-the tooth."

"Since global warming the Abominable Snowman is much less frightening than he used to be."

The Reaper's Arms

"Yes, it's nice my husband has hoarded a fortune, but it would be nicer if he would let me spend some of it though..."

"How many times have I told you kids to hang your coats in the closet?"

I wonder what kind of wizard or vampire my husband will be

Man runs scared from ringing graveyard bell.

"It's no good, Bertie—we must either find some other place to meet or break off the affair altogether."

Phoenix

'MUM, go and get Daddy, there's another knight coming: This is so much fun!'

'A message from the Vikings, sire. It says, 'we've got spirit! Yes, we do! We've got spirit! How about you!?'

Unicorn Working From Home

'I told that boy no snacks before dinner, , ,'

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'

"It appears to be a giant boil, sire."

"I'm getting plasma, iron and platelets. RH positive!"

Monster Baseball

'Oi mate! No hoods in the shopping mall.'

"I had a Caesar salad for lunch, but that was two days ago."

"I don't know, it's just the whole Dark Ages thing. It's got me down."

"A pint for me and one for the woad!"