Driving Practice Champion Pillows

"You've had six accidents?"

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

I drive, therefore I am.

"I failed my driving test...apparently I shouldn't have been texting!"

Women Have To Choose

"Well, come on Son, don't keep us in suspense. Did you pass your driving test?"

'Now, ease off of the clutch...'

'I'm drinking, you're driving - how come you're so happy?'

'Hang on, don't cross now: I can see a car coming...'

'My drug problem is a little different. I'm being drug to P.T.A meetings, drug to little league practice, drug to dance rehersal, drug to...'

Drink kills.

'For throwing spitballs in class, I am sending you to the principle's office. It's nothing personal, It's just a classroom management thing.'

Supermarket traffic lights.

'We'll be a few minutes late. Ed got a primo parking space and he needs a little gloat time.'

"My mom says, you can never be too safe."

Driver Showdown

'Hey, you just cut me off!'

'Directions? You just wanted directions?'

Driver sees 'Yield' road sign as tank is on road in which car merges.

'Your mom as our designated driver, man, is sure putting a damper on our fun!'

New Slush Plan

No Texting! Don't Even Think About It!

'You're going 65 miles-per-hour and your coffee is dangerously hot.'

Motorway Services - "It's good to unwind after all that driving."

'WHOOOEEE! How's that for some fancy driving!?'

'Which side would you like me to drive on today?'

Designated driver at a party.

Good drivers can interpret every sound their vehicle makes.

I'm giving you a ticket!

"Yep, flooded."

"I want something practical, comfortable and fuel-efficient, but that doesn't have an adverse effect on my overall coolness."

You did well right up to the end.

'What do you mean didn't I see it? How do you think I hit it?'