Driving Humor Aficionado Pillows

'If you don't like the way I drive, get off my pavement.'

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

Kick-line Deer Crossing. A kick-line of deer cross the road Radio City Rockettes style.

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

"I can't work on this one. It's too ticklish."

No U-turns

Ducks crossing.

Speed Checked By Radar.

"I've caught you not stopping at a red light."

Shouldn't you clean the windscreen?

"Could we try parking again please, Mr. Zog?"

"Check your mirrors. Signal before pulling into traffic. And watch that lead foot!"

'When you get your permit, you get to sit over here in the driver's seat.'

'Installing 6 foot spikes to stop cars from tailgating me.'

Right lane ends 500 feet. . .Cheer up - it begins again 3 miles.

'When do I learn to elude the cops?'

'Turning Left' lights on front of car.

"Could be just a coincidence, but that whining noise seems to stop when your husband gets out of the car."

'I'm giving you a ticket for driving too slow.'

'Hey -- Watch it with the tailgating'

"Watch out Stan, we've got a tail-gater."

Man driving in tree to wife: 'I think we're lost.'

How's my Reaction Time? Call 1-800-OLDTIMER.

Chief, call you back. Something's come up.

Humpty Dumpty's car.

Need for oil?

'Okay, which ones are the bad guys?'

Econo Air-bag