Driving Diva T-Shirts

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

'You precisely said 'straight over at the roundabout'. You didn't say anything about going around it.'

"I admire the way you avoided that radar trap."

"The very first thing we learn is to kangaroo."

"Why do women live on average three years longer than men?"

"Well, the alternative would be to use your social media accounts to promote toothlessness."

'You the one who called Amnesty International?'

'I'd steer clear of the rum punch.'

Out of patience

Party Time!

'I've got another loose tooth - It's not your cooking is it mum?'

"And if your teeth could hear you, Larry, what would you say to them?"

Vicar's driving lesson "Here endeth the first lesson!"

Brownie Points

"Every time you lick your teeth, you taste your skeleton."

'Honey, it's your worms of the month delivery!'

'Houston, we have a problem. We're going to need a bigger toothbrush.'

'Your new teeth whitener is keeping me up.'

"Please point out the problem tooth."

Dentist as car mechanic with mouth under the bonnet

"She has to arouse you, without, of course, actually arousing you."

'I. Am. So. Embarrassed! How long have I been sitting across from him with that stuck in my teeth?'

"Who should I examine first, you or your lawyer?"

Meanwhile, back at the 'shape' party... 'Hey, check out the square dancing with Brenda...!'

Dancing Doctor

'I'd like to overwhelm them with instructional excellence, but I'm not above winning through intimidation.'

"Ugh! Damn floss..."

'He's our son, Roger. If he feels like a queen trapped inside a drone's thorax, then he feels like a queen trapped inside a drone's thorax.'

"Face it, you'd be lost without me!"

' ... plus you need to floss better.'

My mum is very houseproud.

"You're not serious. You want me to up Latin dance?"

'It;s the xmas party, Jane... let your hair down!'

'That should do it. We'll see you in six months for your next cleaning.'

Jennifer Felt Perfectly Safe Walking Through the Park at Night with Her Handy Cast-Iron Baguette.