Driving Confidence Seeker Pillows

"It was great. I was so confident by the end I reversed all the way home."

People in the mirror may be more attractive than they appear.

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

Warrior Woman

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

'Your inferiority complex is better than mine.'

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

'No, don't tell me, your electric garage door is broken.'

Ego Increasing School

"You've got to learn to love yourself. Start by 'Friending' yourself on Facebook."

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

'But do you realize what this report cart will do to my self-esteem?'

'Welcome to the first meeting of the Shy Men Club.'

Woman walking into Inner Beauty Salon.

"I'm going to be rich, famous, and irresistible to the opposite sex any day now, Randy." "I think you've had one too many hot cocas, little buddy." "No, really. I've written a note for my descendants and buried it in a time capsule in my backyard." "Once they read it, they'll time-travel back to the 20th century and genetically engineer my embryonic self." "They'll bestow me with superhuman charisma, epic good looks, and money-management skills." "You're forgetting that to have descend

"I don't care what you think: it's cool, it's sexy, and I feel totally empowered."

How Gary got his groove back.

'Some people say they're ego-compensation, but what do they know.'

"In light of current market conditions, I've diversified your portfolio to include Lotto tickets and bingo chips."

"I was just like you, then I hired a life coach. Now look at me!"

'I lost my shoe, but I got my foot in the door.'

'Doc, my problem is that I don't believe in myself!'

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'

Tell me about this feeling of inadequacy

PEP TALKS!

Self esteem clinic - Go ahead, take a number. You deserve it.

'If you want them balanced, it'll be an extra 250 dollars.'

"I'm here to warn you, do not eat both slices of cake – you're going to want one tomorrow."

"Your mom wants to buy you a drink."

'See you next week, if I'm still in the job.'

SELF-FULFILLMENT SEMINAR: 'Stop letting people walk on you'

'You can't do anything right. What you need is confidence.'

All dressing rooms now have dimmer switches

'We can increase your self-esteem, but self-respect is more difficult.'