Drink Sippers T-Shirts

'Maybe you're sitting on the wrong end.'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

The last song before the party exploded.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

Beach flirting

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, fell, and retained a brilliant attorney."

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

"Detox is two doors back, bro' - this is retox!"

'Gee, mom, you know I want to visit - I'm just so darned busy.'

Anton's Bar and Grill

"I'm a retriever but I prefer 'Go-Getter'."

Complaints Desk

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

'Come to order' 'I'll have a burger, hold the mayo, and a large cola.'

'Will you stop yelling save the whales and finish you pina colada?'

"Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here."

Happy hour.

'This cola only has half the calories, so if I only drink half that would be no calories!'

“There once was a woman who lived in a can of prebiotic soda… & only then did she consume enough to reap the health benefits claimed on the label.”

"When I was your age, I was a lot older."

'I told you to sip it!'

"I'll just have a Diet Coke. I'm in the middle of my novel."

Gosh dern it, Cookie! Thanks to you the boys won't punch cattle without a frothy cup of yer Mesquite Caramel Cappuccino!

'A wine list? How prosaic. This is our list of lists: beer, wine, single malt scotch, water, soda, cognac...'

'Don't you have anything larger?'

New for Fall

Parson wishing to seem as though he is not drinking