Dressing Room Thinker T-Shirts

"Which one more says 'Cool Guy?'"

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

Women in bed with her husband reads a book titled 'Sex Stinks'.

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"I want that dressing-room mirror fired."

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

"Working from home is a great idea, Dad. We'd just like to establish some kind of dress code."

Honey Costume

"Late Jurassic is so Retro..."

Social Struggles

"I want it to look good, but not ill-gotten-gains good."

"I'm sick and tired of black."

"Well, it's another brand-new day. What do you say to getting up and looking the damn thing straight in the eye?"

Chippunks

A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing.

"Let's see a robot do that."

"It's off the rack. The guy on the rack doesn't need it anymore."

"Hold on a minute, will you? I just want to see what color Charlie Rose's tie is tonight."

"How much more for pinstripes?"

Unsuitable clothing.

"Just think, someday we'll be considered 'retro'."

'I imagine you're interested in one of the more highly visible occupations?'

Smart meter. Smarter meter

'How come they're making size 16 smaller these days?'

Down at the Local Baa-Baa Shop

A guardsman is embarrassed when the wind reveals his bearskin hat is doubling as a 'comb over'.

"Does this shirt make me look gay?"

If a tree falls in the forest but there's no hashtag for it ...

"Do you have any questions apart from 'where did I get my jazzy tie'?"

"Reverend, we need to get you a button-down collar."

Barber Shop in the Coronavirus Age

Surveying.

'Gus! Get over here and see what our tattoos used to look like!'

"Morning Gorgeous!"

"Knees peeking out of jeans are sexy, but what would you know?"