Dreidel Enthusiast Gifts

Time to take your dreidel for a spin.

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

Raheem Sterling

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

The Fall of Gnome

"Garden variety allergies."

'It was a real scroller. I couldn't put down my screen.'

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

"I fell in the mud again. Maybe I need a stunt double."

"Mrs. Beasley, send the employees a memo stating that, from now on, they are to refer to me as 'Alpha Male'."

A convenient attack of swine flu...

'Bernie always sees the glass as half-full, but not for long.'

The Boss.

"I'm treating you like a living deity for one day."

Watering the garden gnome

Balding gnomes

"And afterwards, I'll be signing my new DVD of this presentation in the lobby."

'I don't need such a big office as this. My ego does.'

'I think I missed that episode.'

Better Gnomes.

'It's that damned gnome that attracts them!'

'You were a book all along.'

Middle-Aged Man Celebrates Birthday Riding Escalator Without Holding Handrail!

Doctor Flattened By The ER Rush

"Something's trying to get through the Astroturf!"

"I'm sorry, Mr. Wilson, but your hair just doesn't say anything to me today."

Out of Emergency into Doctor's Lounge

'Remember, you said, a change is as good as a holiday!'

'All I'm saying is I wished you'd specified where you were going put the gnomes when you asked me if we could get some!'

"Please mind the gap between the train timetable and reality."

'Who's your next of kin? When did you last eat or drink? Do you have any allergies? Are you wearing clean underpants?'

"He claims he does the work of two employees."