Dreidel Enthusiasts Gifts

Existential Dreidel

Raheem Sterling

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

"I fell in the mud again. Maybe I need a stunt double."

Dairy Devil

A convenient attack of swine flu...

Sushi Train Spotters

"Spaghetti Rave"

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

Santa Elevator

Doctor Flattened By The ER Rush

Middle-Aged Man Celebrates Birthday Riding Escalator Without Holding Handrail!

'Face it, William - you're shit at it!'

Morbid evidence showing a high dive went terribly wrong!

Out of Emergency into Doctor's Lounge

"Please mind the gap between the train timetable and reality."

'Who's your next of kin? When did you last eat or drink? Do you have any allergies? Are you wearing clean underpants?'

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

Hire Wire Act

"First whack at sword swallowing?"

"Kevin's job as a train announcer seriously affected his love-life..."

Concerned about getting his expectant wife to the hospital on time, Gary hired a stunt driver for the 'big day'.

"Having a fine old name really has been enough for me."

"You gotta love the mpg we're getting!"

"Be right with you. I need to take this real quick."

At the retirement home for daredevils.

Ok, who told him to stick his tongue on the iceberg?

The one thing that drives elephants wild is sickeningly sweet elevator music.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE A MEGALOMANIAC TO WORK HERE, BUT IT SURE DOES HELP!

Train Arrivals

"The only thing that can save it now is a really bad glee club!!"

'Oh, come on -- You only live once!'

The G-nome Project (Mapping the genome).

'Go ahead. If you make it across, they'll be telling your story for years.'

'I'm a little surprised you got planning permission.'