Double Standard Detective Gifts

"I want a woman who's not afraid to have a few extra pounds- but doesn't."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

Can You Spot the Differences?

A boy acting suspiciously

"May I get an equation in edgewise."

The Philip Marlow family

Rumors, lies and innuendo.

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

60 minutes I.Q. test - pick the counterfeit.

'Your dilemma is fabulous. Imagine what a dramaturge could do with it.'

'Nicely done. You may have double-vision, but it's 20-20, 20-20.'

"I'm an atheist. I don't believe in programmers."

"Hmmm...this'll be a tough one..."

Where were you on the night of December 24th between 10pm and 5am

Organ transport team

It isn't just the media that's biased...often the voters are too.

Turn on the news. I will not comply. My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story. There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on Rocky Road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills. Who told you this? Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy.

'Did you see who pushed you?'

'... And he has a real 'Jekyll and Hyde' personality! '

"Look at these tabloid magazines! Gossip is a venomous misuse of the tongue!"

"Move along, people, there's nothing to see here."

Did we end last week with an awesome, startling cliffhanger, or what? I mean, there you dear reader were, thinking what incredible revelation is forthcoming? How could you hint that Sadie Cohen, resident irascible octogenarian, has a dark secret, and then just break for the weekend? And yet … despite the fact that we esteemed and handsome cartoonists taunted you with such a remarkable tease, such a breakthrough narrative moment, we have not been inundated with cards and letters begging for the t

"Uh-oh!. . . Look out! Where did he come from? Something spooky is going on in this picture...Can you spot it?"

"Do you offer a warranty?"

A man is tied to a chair and forced to watch TV news.

I'm not avoiding you!

"You see, there's proof I'm in the majority. I don't believe in polls and neither do 59% of other guys."

Detective Honky

"Quick! Follow that dish and spoon!"

'Ok, let me get this straight; your friend Kristyn is no longer coming to have supper with us because Danielle told you that Tracy heard from Holly that her sister Melissa thought she saw Kristyn in the mall talking to your old boyfriend?'

"I never believe office gossip unless it's backed by some substantial rumors."

Sherlock Holmes and the case of the missing cocaine

"I really like the author's characterizations, and her dialog is witty and well paced. . . the ending threw me off though, I never would have guessed the killer was the stepson.£

'Keep an eye on Jimmy the Shark during today's meeting. You can always tell if he's planning a double-cross by the way he fidgets with his iPhone.'

'The McCain-Palin ticket is now up two points in the polls over Obama-Biden.', 'Racism!', 'The Obama-Biden ticket is now up two points in the polls over McCain-Palin.', 'Sexism!'