Doomsday Dweller Gifts

I Survived End of The World After Party

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'Don't ask me why but he feels a great deal of pride in calling it his 'man-cave'.'

Optimist

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

Early on-line shopping

Apocalypse Research Center

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

"All I'm saying is now is the time to develop the technology to deflect an asteroid."

Student Food Pyramid

"Has anyone seen my therapist?"

"Remember, son, no matter what happens to you, we intend to always keep your room at home exactly as it is right now...empty."

I will not write on walls. I will not write on walls...

Room-mate Homicides Waiting to Happen. . .

'The hardest part of being a street crazy is picking each day's sign.'

'To prepare for Y2K, I backed up all discs and documents. . . stockpiled water and non-perishables. . . converted my investments to cash and set up a wood burning stove.'

'My father carried this sign before me, as did his father before him.'

"No, first you have to evolve into a man, then you can have a man-cave."

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

Sun crashing into sea foils rescue attempt.

'Mum, my teacher said I had good physical attributes for speaking Italian...'

Doomsday marketing

A Bubble of Countryside.

How to survive the coming crash.

"And then yesterday, I had an epiphany: The best way for me to overcome my paralyzing fear of a global ecological/economic collapse is to find a way to turn it into a lucrative career!"

"Why won’t you just admit you forgot where you parked the car?"

Climate Change Contingency House

The End is Near/Just the Beginning

"Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!"

"I find your projections a little pessimistic, Lee."

"What really bothers me is he's my financial advisor."

The World Ends Today!: 'Never mind, dear- better luck tomorrow!'

Prepare to meet your author today!

The End is Nigh

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."