Doom Prophet Gifts

"I have difficulty expressing my feelings."

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

Moses on the web

'We manufacture micro computing circuits. We're looking to hire someone who can anticipate the next small thing.'

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

Pie Filling Reader

Smiling businessman with rising profits

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

"Oh, I can't complain"

"I really don't care what yours says. My weather app says rain for 40 days and 40 nights. I think you should probably go with that, Noah."

'This is why we can't have nice things... '

The End of the World is postponed from 2000 to 2112.

'I think you'll find these projections somewhat exaggerated, but in a good way.'

"Love your feng shui!"

"Oh, the crystal ball rolled off and fell right on my foot! Didn't see it coming!"

Perhaps we could get the Saatchis to pain a pretty picture.

'Here's the improved margins you said you wanted to see this year, Tom.'

"Graphs are like EKGs, they show the health of a company."

"...and right here in Q2 is where the 'you know what' hit the fan. . ."

Energy Conservation Be Damned. Fred constantly prepared for Global Warming and Nuclear Winter to happen at the same time.

"Our accountancy firm says that there are a number of ways to interpret the figures... which one do you prefer?"

"Damn. Totally mis-read that."

"The short term solution is money and the long term solution more money."

'My father carried this sign before me, as did his father before him.'

Before becoming the legend that he is today, Nostradamus first enjoyed a pretty good living at the tracks.

'Of course, for me, Christmas has a deeply felt religious significance! The stock exchange is my church...!

"I can't decide which I'd rather do- make a twenty-billion-dollar bid of turn down a twenty-billion-dollar bid."

doom.com

End of world nigh!!!

"Don't worry, it's nothing."

A self-filling prophecy.

"That's our projected sales."

'No doubt the upturn will come soon because the sheet of paper ends here!'

"This is very mysterious. I can't seem to pick up anything at all about you, but I see 'Ivan the Terrible' coming to the Thalia."