Domestic Strategists Pillows

"Yesterday's clothes, which weren't quite dirty enough to wash, or clean enough to put away" "The day before yesterday's clothes" "A parcel you have forgotten to send back" "Your sense of inner peace and harmony" "Clothes from the day before that" "A beloved sock, last seen in February 2023"

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

That's What Happens

"Did you get my e-mail about who takes out the trash today?"

"That doesn't look like setting the table to me."

'You'll learn that our corporate structure is a bit unconventional.'

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

"Have you got any arguments why the world should trust in US policy?"

Eye Off the Ball

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

"Mommy is having another baby. Let me assure you that any paradigm shift will be incremental, core values remain family-centric, and Mommy is committed to assimilation and building synergy."

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

'We need to start dividing the housework for more peaceful marriages?' - What they'd say if they really wanted the women's vote.

The Thing That Won't Leave

"I'm sorry, you must have me confused with someone that does yard work."

'You'll have more luck getting the sword out of the stone than getting the remote control out of his hand.'

Mission accomplished.

'No. No. Don't bomb them now. Wait until morning, when the birds are singing and the air is alive with a sense of possibility.'

Bird Cage Cover over Wife's Head

"...But it's only Thursday. I'll be confused all day now."

When a nanosecond is forever.

"I like it; but let's make sure we can get the domain name first."

'I need a change in my life. From now on it's all wheeling and no dealing'

"Call it wishful thinking, but I don't think this peace will last. . . ."

'You may be the CEO of a large corporation, but at home you're an OMW, observe my whims!'

"Bloody houseflies...."

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"O.K., but let's say you have up to six hundred intruders per minute."

Afghanistan 2001 and 2021

'General, You look pale this morning...' - 'I had a nightmare Admiral! I dreamed the war began!'

'I'd go small with this burglar. Way too much collateral damage with the cannon.'

Drones, Explained

Democrats' Brilliant Scheme to Bring Down President Trump

The Manager's Wife.

Good disciplinarian gaining respect vs. scary nutcase.