Domestic Responsibilities Pillows

'I'll tell you what mister - I'll lose ten pounds and stop nagging, the same day you act your age, cleanup after yourself, cook your own food and get a brain in that fat head.'

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

"The dryer giveth and the dryer taketh away."

"I really miss being in a committed relationship, Randy." "Which part do you miss most?" "Having someone disagree with you over what you're going to eat, or over what TV shows you're going to watch? Or do you miss having to account for how you spend your time? Or having to explain why you bought yourself something awesome without first getting permission?" "Mostly I miss the back rubs. They don't ask you to wash the dishes first at massage parlors."

When laundry ruled the waves.

Neighbor Leaf Wars

Kitchen Tetris

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

Ironing day.

Woman simutaneously playing the cello and washing man in bath's back

"You get back here this minute, young man! You're not going anywhere until you clean your room!"

The household cavalry

"For God's sake, Lucille. We're IN a vacuum."

'There's an app you can program to delete your trash? I've had one for years called Dave.'

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

Pest Control

'He's not here right now. He's out pumping iron.'

Futile Little Snow Shoveler Guy Snow Globe

"I have my pants put on one leg at a time."

'Whenever Mat gets a little over-confident, I tell him to try to fold a fitted bed sheet.'

"And this latest robot vacuum can fetch a glass of wine while it cleans your floors!"

Separation Anxiety

Cook being told what to do by housemaid

Child doing the washing up

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

'Not bad. Already 17 minutes into Saturday morning before I receive my first ultimatum.'

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

'Sorting the laundry is hell.'

'Harold, I told you to take out the trash!'

Tortoise polishing his shell

"I am not ‘politicizing the issue’ — I simply asked you to pick up your room!"

"So what if they notice a stain? Everyone gets tummy aches. Besides, we’re conserving energy."

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."