Doggy Business Handler T-Shirts

"I'm taking him out to do his 'job'."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

Pushy Dog

'The word bath is mentioned.'

I like you and I like your company!

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

"What these product ideas lack is a little bite."

'Once again you have exceeded my expectations.'

'Rex! Have you been counting the sheep again?'

A child and his dog

"He did it!"

"There you go with that typical police mentality."

a new hire signing a loyalty oath

"3:14 p.m. Suspect drives to lakeside resort. Rents rowboat under false name. Tosses evidence into... wait, how do I tell anyone?" Topper: Undercover police dog

"I'll walk, you shovel."

I think you started off sending him the wrong message when you named him Alpha.

"I hope you've had as much fun training me as I've had being trained."

Police Dept. K-9 Unit. Just once I'd like to go undercover as a bad dog.

"I lost my way and wandered through this white hell for five days before your brave rescue dog found me and saved me from starving to death!"

'Damn showdog people!'

Rancher builds fence around angry bull.

'He's a sniffer dog-trained to sniff out dope.'

"She barks once for drugs, twice for weapons, and ten times for candy bars."

'I wish I could do Search and Rescue too: When you're a Police Dog, the people you find don't actually want to be found...'

"Listen, buddy, a lot of dogs accidentally wee-wee at Westminster."

A recurring crisis at the Farkinski farm

'Did you read my email about Timmy falling down the well?'

He Did It!

"Yeah, but it doesn't smell like a bomb!"