Doggie Dilemmas Gifts

Canine conundrum.

Choices that face a dog.

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"You keep impeccable time."

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

Too Much Coffee Man

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

'Bugger it, we're out of beer!'

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.

"I'm running late for totally dignified reasons."

I was allowed to chew this. But not that

"Bailey! What part of 'never jump on the Stickley' don't you understand?!"

'I'm sorry, this is the line for people who volunteered to help their community. You're looking for the eternal damnation department.'

New Years Reolutions

"Oh shit! What have I done? Undo key! Undo key!"

'Maybe we should rethink this new dog door.'

"These are the care instructions. And if things don't work out, there's a recipe on the back."

'I think your doctor gave you the wrong note, Sir. We don't have any bread and milk.'

'Sammy's going to take you for a little walk.'

"Should we raise him to succeed by nurturing him, or neglect him so severely that he finds success as a megalomaniacal sociopath?"

"Are you trying to get me nicked."

Dog fetching smelly slippers.

"I know I said my dog had no teeth, mister- but that's not my dog!"

"I should've never taught you to shake."

"Don't pretend it's a pet, you're just too mean to buy an alarm clock!"

'I don't need to go on a diet. All I need is a bigger pair of pants.'

'Wait...Sir...It's customary to pay for services when rendered!'

'That's $10.00 for Ben's physical, $7.50 for the rabies shot, $22.50 for the pants, $14.95 for the shirt...'

Poonami

Cat laughing at dog having to go outside in the rain to go to the toilet.

'I know I said, 'my dog doesn't bite'...he's not my dog!'

"Please feel free to regift it."

'A catered affair?! You're going to cheat on me and your diet?!'

'What's this? 'Registered retriever stud service, your place or mine' then it gives our phone number.'

'I'm sorry Roland, I'm starving and I'll have to have to eat you...sniff. Roland would have loved those bones.'