Dog Trainers Gifts

Pavlov's Dog.

'You do a fine job guarding the place, we just need you to shed less.'

"I said FETCH! Not KVETCH!"

Soapbox Lectures - To an audience of a dog.

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

'I told you, never utter that four letter work - 'walk!''

"Shouldn't hide treats in your back pocket with a dog that big."

Dog executives are in a duel

"Disgusting! I'm never going to get this guy properly trained! I think I'll just abandon him somewhere!"

"I thought it would be difficult to paper train a dog, but Spot made a remarkable adjustment!"

'Maybe you should see a psychiatrist.' 'I wish I could but I'm not allowed on the couch.'

'Sorry, they all smell the same to me.'

'He's very well trained - he even puts the seat back down when he's done.'

"I used to be a dog-walker."

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

"I'd go to obedience school, but I don't want to take out any student bones."

"Jerk." "Jackass." "Screw you." "Bite me."

"Company? My God, I'd wet the floor too."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"Behold the secret to happiness."

Bitchbark Canoe

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

Polly txt speak

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

"Pick me!"

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'