Dog Teaser Pillows

'Fetch Fetch Fetch'

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

'HA Ha! One good idea doesn't make a genius!'

Rodin's Thinker.

"Have you been working out?"

"If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, does it make a sound?"

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

'You see doctor I've been increasingly Forgetful.'

Suddenly Paul realised that HE had been the odd one out all along.

Can you translate that to simple-minded!

Woman Bishop with vacuum cleaner. Vicar saying 'It's to appease the traditionalists.'

"Whoops..."

'Do either of you fancy joining our pub quiz team?'

Man with 'low memory' on his phone and his head

"When you sit down, you get a shock. Open a book, you get a shock. Write something, another shock. It's a typical psychology class."

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

Culturally significant problems solved

'We use that computer strictly for the office grapevine.'

'Stop annoying the dog Andrew!'

Woman says, 'How did your memory improvement class go last night?' Man answers, 'I completely forgot about it!'

"Terrific solution. Now if we could only find a problem fit it."

Amnesiac Deja View

"Y'know, sometimes I actually think those chipmunks in the back yard really are teasing him!"

Remembering passwords.

'Bottle nose! Bottle nose!'

I confess, I'm one of the bloggers that's hurting the journalism business. You? I blog stories about my local community. You have journalistic training? Of course. I've spent years watching Shepard Smith and Montel Williams. The visitor wept with respect. Shoot me.

'My dad says I'm good at training little animals - Sit, boy!'

"Don't worry, and don't listen to your brother! You can't really smell fear: it's just an expression..."

So your IQ is 176, Peel? - 'Yeah!' - 'That's higher than Einstein.' - 'Cool.' - 'Do something amazing.' - 'I don't know how.' -

Darn, there's always one piece leftover that doesn't fit anywhere.

'and to think I never used to believe all that stuff about women drivers!'

'He calls me lambchop and I call him muttonhead.'

'But, somehow, sudoku baffles me.'

'I'm getting a tattoo removed just to annoy my parents.'

'Did you hear about the fool who goes around saying no all the time?'