Dog Owner Spouse Pillows

'Which bag is the dog mess in?'

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

'That was fun!'

Dog Walking Services

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

'I'm not sure which one is the role model.'

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

'Why can't my walks be that fun?'

Cling-On Dog

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

Love a Mutt

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

A man and his dog

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

"He's got no idea how to run a Husky team."

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

'Yes I know I'm intelligent and famous, but I'd trade it all for a good old belly scratching.'

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

Dogma

Epic Battles

"Looks like a pretty quiet night out there, huh, girl?"

Dogs life

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'