Dodging Detectives Pillows

'How much tax can I avoid by becoming a Philanthropist?'

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

A boy acting suspiciously

The Fast Lane.

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

Is Driving Doomed?

“It's $195 million. Now, I know what you're thinking: 'OK, what's the catch?'”

That's supposed to say garage sale!

Sale.

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

"Pssst. Fake poop."

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

Customer Convention

Half-Price Haircut and Half-Cut Price Hair.

"Tee-Hee! Working like a charm!"

Screwdriver labelled 'Buyer' and screw labelled 'seller'.

'hold the blog - I got a bargain in the sales'

Pizza Special: 5 Pizzas for $50 (Limit 4).

"What's the problem? I said dinner and a movie."

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of "CSI: Miami" to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45pm? The Youtube generation grows up fast.

"I'm innocent. I've just never been able to pass up a good plea bargain."

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

"I give you the seven-billion dollar pup, then you give me back the seven-billion-dollar pup."

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

The Bargain Brand

"We think we've found the murder weapon Sir"

"Which will it be - do we label it '20% free', and raise the price 20%, or label lit '40% free', and raise the price 40%?"

Boomerang Sale! - No Returns

Black Friday

"As you know we've made a lot of acquisitions lately, and the last one we made seems to have resulted in us buying ourselves."

"TV violence made him do it. Says he'll name shows if we drop the charges."

'The gas bill is a lot bigger than usual.'