Divinely Inclined Pillows

"It doesn't pay to jump up and down with rage, up here."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Then it's agreed. Judgment Day, whenever it comes, will fall on a Thursday, so that they'll get the long weekend."

"Isn't there an app for this?"

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

"The key to success is knowing what people want. Too bad it isn't knowing what people don't want."

'We know it's good...we had an excellent ghost writer.'

Vicar's driving lesson "Here endeth the first lesson!"

"Just my luck."

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with out bank chaplain."

"And on the seventh day, God 'choked,' and all hell broke loose."

"And God called the light day."

Devil worried because he feels good

"It says God created heaven and earth, then there was light. Why didn't He do it the other way round, when He could see what He was doing?"

Yahweh/Your Way

"I'm sending you to someone who's less squeamish."

"For the last time- I can't Rapture you out to the Hamptons."

"Sit still why I explain why exercise is important."

"OK, just between you and me: The free will thing? What was your angle in all that?"

"And then in Italy Giovanni has found his soulmate"

"What I'll miss most is his indefatigable optimism."

"Why corona? I thought they were getting a bit too cocky."

'Your extensive anxiety condition was brought about by worrying about a national health plan.'

You've Got Questions, We've Got Answers.

Heaven - "You are here" sign.

'Hang on, we might finally be getting his feedback on our new product proposal.'

'New Charismatic'

"Well, you asked for a sign!"

God throwing a lifebelt.

"I feel like a hypocrite writing a report on the Green Revolution. My trust fund portfolio has oil, mining, and tobacco stocks."

"No way, you guys are angels? I have a GREAT idea for a miracle."

'Drawbridge ahead'

Lourdes Miracles.

God's secretary.