Divine Seamstress T-Shirts

"Eighty percent polyester."

I quilt therefore I am

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

Eagle (The Divine Comedy).

Arts and crafts

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

"My child when you look at a flower,you see the face of god!"

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

Purple dress

"Didn't your last blouse fall apart in two days?"

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

"Tia Carmen, can you make a new dress for my doll?"

Sew on a sequin!

'I caught one, I actually caught one.'

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

101 uses of a dead cat: pincushion

'He agreed that she might have a point.'

Newton's cradle

'I need it in a size two for now and a size five for when I put on my rebound weight.'

Jesus Christ

"I'll take new members any way I can get them."

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

"Have ye seen a whale that matches this swatch?"

"I've been working on this project non-stop, twenty four-six!"

"Is there a seamstress present?"

A tailor measuring a large man

'All right, who sewed in the disposable diaper?'

God Plays Baseball with the Earth

'School of secondary sex characteristics'

'From creating stuff like this you make a LIVING?'

'Muriel makes all her own clothes out of junk mail.'