Divine Punchline Appreciator Pillows

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

Night-time halo

"OMG, LOL!"

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

Jesus sighted walking off Malibu

"He wants us to start calling him 'Head Honcho'."

Heaven

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

'Oh, sure -- but He won't let US have pets!'

"The transformation is pretty bad, but the worst part is filling out the paperwork for the adverse events."

''Adam and Eve'? -- then You're going ahead with the dualism idea?'

'Actually, we were hoping for a less high-maintenance God.'

God changes His will.

"It was a gift from god."

'Stay back from the edge. Remember what happened to the last angel that fell.'

'But your advert said, Fantastic view.' - 'She's out right now.'

Today's presentation - God's Miracles.

''Halliburton'? Wait a minute! -- I meant for the MEEK to inherit the Earth!'

'You don't want to go to hell, J.B. In hell, the market is always down.'

'Don't get up until nine.' - 'What time is it now?'

'You had a lunch date, but I cancelled it because it was your turn to pay.'

'The diagnostic computer thinks it's a punishment from God.'

Moses parts the sea causing Jesus, who is walking on water, to fall

Jesus is coming. Look busy.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I've been wonderful, you've been the audience - goodnight!"