Divine Film Aficionado T-Shirts

'You realize of course everything here is G-rated.'

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Bloody hell!"

'There's nothing on.'

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

'It's not for myself, you understand."

Kritik's Korner

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

"It's cool – God told us to!"

Canadian film production

'It was great. I hated it.'

Zeus's Caddy

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

Moby Dick

"You can tell it's a period drama because they're not wearing ozone helmets."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

Binge Watch

Arnold's first day on the job - 'What do you mean...no director!!!...and who is going to tell me what to do?'

Movies vs. Films

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

Movie Awards. That movie always comes alone and never stays for the after-party. It's an independent film.

"But you can eat as much as you want from the tree of bullshit."

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

Film Star Robert de Niro