Divine Drivers Gifts

Vicar's driving lesson "Here endeth the first lesson!"

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

'Okay - who leaked?'

"An object of love that you can get inside, totally inside."

'God sees everything? You mean He channel surfs?'

Route 666.

'Wow! -- Talk about family values!'

Heavy Traffic.

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

Give Way To Cyclists

"I think you better let me drive, I haven't renewed your license yet."

Gas eyedropper.

Moses conducts the Red Sea orchestra.

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

I've stopped you so often I've decided to give you a season ticket!

Rock Climber and Angel Selfie

The Pope's bags getting carried by an angel.

'Another short-cut, dear?'

GPS: 'Sorry return to the main road.'

"You realise that the job involves Sunday work?"

A leap of faith.

Today's lesson: the plague of darkness

'Now I know why this Satnav was going out cheap.'

God's Writers Block

"Up here, we call it 'Nectar of the Gods' not 'Devil's Brew'!"

"Just accept the ticket and let's go. The hot dog's getting cold."

"It has a nice, divine quality without being overly liturgical."

"Dry cleaning, pet store, Salvation Army - I'd be lost without my stickies on the dash!"

'Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?'

Baby kangaroo has a seatbelt on.

DMV - Enter Here

Parking

Smelling Salts at the Petrol Station.

'Whoa - you're not murdering anybody today until you get your seat belt on, mister backseat psychopath!'

'The miles per gallon it gets for city driving is an urban legend.'