Divine Dining Fans T-Shirts

"Do you have anything with a view of God?"

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

Vishnu playing twin neck guitar.

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"What did Jesus order?"

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

"How about a little more coffee?"

Steam from dinner in restaurant forms dollar sign

"I could have sworn I had three sausages!"

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

'Right you lot, listen. Hands up for soup. . .'

"Now that everyone's in...how do we get the food?"

Nouveau wine

'Sorry about that - Lenny accidentally used jumping beans.'

'At these prices can't you afford a kitchen?' Burner at the table

"It tastes and smells just like a glass of wine!"

"I'm told the omelettes here have a broader purpose."

"Ah, Monsieur has made a very expensive choice!"

"Pecan pie with rum-raisin ice cream is the best revenge."

'May I recommend the red wine?'

Cat's wine has live fish in it.

'On the paupiettes de boeuf a la hongroise, which part is the hongroise?'

The entrées were $30 each. The extra $15 is for all that damn fresh pepper you made me grind!

"This wine is from a very fresh yield."