Divine Comic Appreciator Gifts

Up on High.

Night-time halo

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"It's cool – God told us to!"

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"OMG, LOL!"

Zeus's Caddy

"But you can eat as much as you want from the tree of bullshit."

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

Jesus sighted walking off Malibu

God pulling the plug on January 1st 2000

'And on June 30th of that same year, you used The Bible as a coaster?'

"My name's God, and I approve this message."

"No, you cannot have another planet. You only played with the last one for a week."

"Oh boy, by the way this guy is moving, we can assume he's got some of our friends in his pants..."

"Whew! What a day! I just get out of bed and all Hell breaks loose."

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

God's Law.

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

'5.40pm on the 2nd day....and still waiting for the surveyor'

Earth Mover 3000: A not-so-happy God with the humans about to use an Earth Mover on Planet Earth

Heaven

New, Improved Cat

'Sometimes it's not a very good idea to be indecisive.'

''Adam and Eve'? -- then You're going ahead with the dualism idea?'

Self-Esteem Clinic.

'Actually, we were hoping for a less high-maintenance God.'