Distance Defiers T-Shirts

Zoom Wedding

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

Head over Hooves

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

To do before Saturday...

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

Emergency exit into Space

"I got an 'A' for my anti-gravity science project!"

"Well, guys... I guess we'll just have to ask Siri where we are." "No! Don't do that!" "Yeah! We know exactly what we're doing!" "Dude! Have you forgotten our credo?" "Society for the refusal to ask for directions."

Einstein's brother developed the theory of 'relativism'.

kid skateboards off airplane wingtip

These upside-down tomato planters simplify everything. But, dad. Mother nature wants plants to grow upwards. Sez who?

'Eric! Look for his pressure point! He's got to have a pressure point somewhere!'

'Now I don't know what it's like in New York, but this is Kansas city, and we follow the laws of physics out here.'

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

Doctors without borders, gravity, or air.

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

"That's many giant leaps for man."

"Target in range. Ready... hug."

Weight Gain Denial

"You're under arrest for breaking the law of gravity! You have the right to..."

Trampoline Balance

Fun with Ned-Ball.

Hill Walking Boots: 'I'll take them.'

Trapeze Artists

Proposed Changes To The Laws Of Gravity

"This is what happens when we don't practice social distancing."

Cross-Country Sledding

Athletic Games on the Moon.

'You're going to have to drop out if you want to graduate.'

"Typical. You don't even know what's impossible!"

'I was a drifter. They got me for defying the law of gravity.'

'Come on! You only live once!'

'Jeff! You need to keep one foot on the ground!'