Discussing Gifts

Many couples at a sidewalk cafe engaged in serious conversation; a sign next to them reads "Caution! People trying to work it out".

'He's always looking for an argument!'

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

Opportunities in Coronatimes

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

We Tenatively Oppose War on Strictly Procedural Grounds

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

'The meek shall inherit the debt. The rich shall inherit the loopholes.'

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

Vote Centrist to Keep Things Exactly as Awful as They Are

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

"Away with the warmonger!"

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

Annual run-off at the mouth.

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

The International and May Day Terrorism

'Do you think that's wise?'

What's normal?

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."