Disaster Chef Admirer Pillows

'Should my souffle blow the oven door off?'

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

TV Chef Cooking Range

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

'The casserole didn't make it.'

'Oh, hi!... yes, we have another emergency... make it the usual, and you know the address!'

Hot Halloween Costumes

Okay, let me guess...we're eating baked ham and meat loaf on a bed of fish sticks because you combined all the leftovers...

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

"The scallops were delicious, but the fork was dismal!"

"I'm here to fix the lasagne."

'Something in the fridge has gone off.'

"Are you still waiting for the pancake to come down?"

"The fire department ruined dinner."

'Well excuse me, but if your chef's so great, why is he in the kitchen instead of a TV show?'

"Arrrrrrrrr. This be bad."

"Whoa! That's a lot of flame, Beth. I'll pick up a fire extinguisher on my way back from the gym."

Dave's How to Puke Book.

"Well it's either my dinner or my shirt."

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

'Do you mind if I smoke?'

"How did you know we were having pancake flambe again?"

'That new recipe didn't quite work out. Do you fancy popping down to the chippy?'

'Here we put the emphasis exclusively on the food!'

'What do you mean, send out for pizza? This is pizza!'

The Origin of Volcanic Eruptions.

Smelly fish.

"How is everything?"

'I'm not an experienced cook so I use the smoke alarm as my timer!'

Smoke gets in your eyes.

'Jeeves, you've made this soup taste like absolute s**t! Well done!'

"I'm sorry, the sesame peanut dressing is not agreeing with him."