Directional Humor Pillows

Left and Right: Please be consistent.

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

One way only.

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

"Look at her...Gracie is intelligent, optimistic, ambitious..I wish she was one more thing."

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

A signaller directing pallbearers

"Chicken on a bend of spinach and onions?"

'What's your thumb doing on my steak?' 'Want me to drop it again?'

"Safe? Of course it's safe! I do fireworks every year!"

'My teacher has a good memory. She remembers what a rotten kid you were.'

'My eyesight was getting worse, but thanks to my new glasses, I can play 'Monkey see, Monkey do' again...'

'What's the special?'

'You're being replaced by a machine...But at least it's an American-made machine.'

'You're putting that saddle on backwards.' - 'How do you know which way I'm going?'

"In lieu of a tip, can one of you take a shift for me?"

"We're not so different, you and I."

Plane annoys penthouse apartment.

Dad, stop! Put your glasses on! You're about to eat a stick insect!

Woman gossiping on emergency phone

There goes professor Elactic!

'As a safety feature, I flattened one side.'

A hunter missing his target

Eye Test.

'You are ear.'

Directions, "Aye, it's down the road, first left after the squashed hedgehog"

"Is the rabbit cute?"

What I Know. . .

A man asking a sailor for directions

'How can I possibly be a discipline problem? I'm usually asleep.'