Diplomatic Chess Player T-Shirts

'Mr Tree, please let me pass, you're in my way... Mr Tree, please let me pass, you're in my way... Mr Tree, please let me pass, you're in my way... You're not listening, right?'

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

"You moved two spaced and then one space to the side? Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that sure sounds illegal."

To attract a bigger audience, the world chess federation allow fans to distract an opponent when it's his move.

"Frankly, we’re concerned about your checkered past."

Prawn Amend

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

A gorilla plays chess with his keeper.

'I can not get this game, the pieces all move like cats.'

Vladimir Putin as Uncle Sam

'Some game dog you are. That's the fifth time in a row you've fallen for the King's Gambit.'

"Once inside, the pawns will jump out and take them by surprise."

'It's true that money can't buy everything, Caldwell, but it's not healthy to dwell on it.'

Trojan Chess

Bored Baker

Pawn Stars

Chess on TV

Excess Baggage: If you can draw, you don't have to know the local language.

'Do you want to be red Tory or blue Labour?'

'Maybe it's me, but I have a feeling we're being used as pawns.'

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"

"He was right, you know - a queen can move as many spaces as she likes."

Chess player looking dazed playing computer,"He's crashed."

Cat chess

John Kerry

The puppet master

Chess player painting all the pieces his colour.

"How do you expect to learn to be a good loser when you win all the time?"

'Despite it's dominance at chess, our computer just plain stinks at charades.'

Career Threatening Sport Injuries,

'Miss Carruthers, check and see if we have an extradition treaty with Disneyland.'

The Godfather Sends Chess Master Bobby Fischer a Message. . .

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

The chess pieces that fell off the chequered flag

Next Terrifying Military Threats