Diplomacy Gifts

"No need. I have diplomatic immunity."

'Maybe you should reconsider those place cards, Ms Harris?' (Negotiation talks/Good Guys/Bad Guys)

"The world would be a better place if everyone just thought the way I do."

'Negotiating skills need fine tuning.'

"Finally we have something in common...mutual distrust."

Veto Powers

"I welcome the discussion."

'Eight hours of negotiation and all you can say is you agree to disagree?'

"Take this, Saddam! And this! Well, I hope it hurts, man! No mercy!"

"Look, everyone here loves vanilla, right? So let's start there."

'I prefer this way of resolving conflict.'

Conflict is harder to sustain when you don't see everything in black and white.

"You know how it is! We got a warhead, they have to get a warhead."

'I think he wants you to pull his finger Mr President'

"Don't worry - any sign of Putin and we hit them with more sanctions."

'First you drop hints - if that doesn't work, you drop bombs.'

Congress of Berlin- The Partition of Turkey

"Our intelligence shows that everybody loves us."

Bismarck and Disraeli agree to Austrian Occupation of Bosnia-Herzegovina

'My foreign policy isn't working - write me up another one.'

"Don't panic. It's one of ours!"

Arms Fair - "Of course as part of our ethical foreigh policy the 20 kiloton population fragmentation bomb is only available to respectable governments."

"Perhaps we'd be more likely to reach an agreement if the British delegate would stop shouting 'Deal or no deal' all the time."

Obama visits Cuba

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

"My people will get back to your people."

'In Today's news, every country blamed another country for their internal problems.'

'Sorry, kid. Anything but world peace.'

Tug-of-Limited-Hostility: "The ground rules: Pull for three seconds, then discuss it for a while. Pull and discuss, pull and discuss..."

'So, what do you want to talk about?'

'What is tact?' 'The unsaid part of what you think.'

'Here, guys...take a lighter!'

'Diplomacy is skating on thin ice without ending up in deep water.'

The peace talks collapsed when the dogs insisted the sandbox had to go out in the hall.

"I sure hope the negotiations go well."