Dinosaur Jokes Pillows

"How do you spell, asteroid?"

'It's an extinction notice.'

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"Something will fall down from the sky and it will be the end of the world - just because you didn't eat all of your carrion for lunch, my boy!"

'Of course, I'm not one of those glamorous paleontologists who are all over TV these days.'

Tyrannosaurus Tex

"Fasten your seat belt."

"Speaker phone!!! You gotta put it on speaker phone!"

Jurassic Ark

'He's a pretty good pet, except for the 'walkies' part.'

T-rex takes a selfie

"How can you just sit there, wrapped in your own safe little world, when you know there are millions of squirrels out there?"

I've been on this green leafy diet for months...

The final proof that they were closer to humans than we ever thought.

The little rascal! He knows we're watching him and that he's safe next to his warren, so he's mooning us!

"William dabbles in paleontology."

'I've noticed that it's only since I started laying golden eggs that everybody wants to be my friend...'

Bear: 'Oh YUM, Burritos!'

"Was it someone you ate?"

"My marriage is like a walk in the park. Jurassic is a park, right?"

"It is exactly hundred million and four years, 6 months, 2 weeks and 4 days old. I know that because it was a hundred million years old when I started work here..."

'C'mon - help me bring him down and I'll split him with you!'

Ant is banished for playing the bagpipes.

Evolution was harsh for the long-fingered Fliposaur.

Dinosaur Dining

'Hey, you're the one who said he was too old to order off the kids' menu.'

Harry Dinsdale was way, way ahead of his time.

"Careful, Mel. Boys only want one thing."

"The arms wouldn't be so noticeable if he'd stop playing air guitar."

"Now whose arms are tiny and useless?"

Dinosaurs Playing Poker.

'He's a pretty good pet, except for the 'walkies' part.'

"I heard you were extinct!"